DON'T YOU DARE BAIL - LDS Hymn Parody #127

The leaders of the Mormon Church never cease to amaze me with the ammo they continue to give to those who have left Mormonism.  The newest example of this is a speech given by Jeffrey R. Holland at a Tempe Arizona Devotional on April 26,2016.  In that speech, he said, "Don’t you dare bail.  I am so furious with people who leave this church.  I don’t know whether 'furious' is a good apostolic word.  But I am.  What on earth kind of conviction is that?  What kind of patty-cake, taffy-pull experience is that? As if none of this ever mattered, as if nothing in our contemporary life matters, as if this is all just supposed to be 'just exactly the way I want it and answer every one of my questions and pursue this and occupy that and defy this - and then maybe I'll be a Latter-Day Saint?!' Well, there's too much Irish in me for that."

And then he finished his rant by saying, "This church means everything to me!  Everything! I don't care what happens.  I don't care what price is to be paid.  As painful as that can be ans as much as I don't want to invite the test, as much as I don't want to sound arrogant or self-confident or filled with any kind of price other than the love of the Lord, this church means everything to me, and I'm not going to leave it, and I'm not going to let you leave it."  Whoa... I'm not going to let you leave it?!!  Cult much??  

Of course, memes and comments about his speech have hit the Ex-Mormon groups on Facebook like a thunderstorm (like the ones I've included here).  There's even a post on You Tube called Angry Holland about this rant.  It's all been very entertaining.  

Another outgrowth of his speech is that I immediately starting writing an LDS hymn parody in my mind (as I've said on here before, "Because they make it so easy!!").  Of course, sometimes these LDS hymn parodies write themselves, and this was one of those.

So here's my 127th LDS hymn parody, dedicated to Jeffrey R. Holland for the entertainment value... because he always knows just what to say. 

DON’T YOU DARE BAIL

Sung to the tune of True to the Faith – #254

1. When you’re faced with many questions

And it seems to not make sense,

Will you bail on Mormonism

Even though there’s no defense?  No!!

(Chorus)

Don’t you dare bail on the Mormon religion,

Though you can see that it’s full of deception.

No patty cake, that’s a mistake,

No taffy pulling, for goodness sake!!

2. Though we know that it’s a shit show,

And the lies are obvious,
Will you bail on Mormonism
And make Holland furious?  No!!

(Chorus)

Don’t you dare bail on the Mormon religion,

Though you can see that it’s full of deception.

No patty cake, that’s a mistake,

No taffy pulling, for goodness sake!!

3. While we know the sordid history

And how silly it can sound,
Will we stand by our convictions,
And not patty-cake around?  Yes!!

(Chorus)

Don’t you dare bail on the Mormon religion,

Though you can see that it’s full of deception.

No patty cake, that’s a mistake,

No taffy pulling, for goodness sake!!

4. When we hear from Jeffrey Holland

As he spews his words of fear,

What on earth would make us doubt it?

After all, it’s all so clear.  NOT!!

(Chorus)

And so I bailed on the Mormon religion,

Mainly because it is full of deception.

Leave me alone, don't even phone,
I am no longer a Mormon clone!!

© Diane Tingen, 5/4/2016

THE CRAZY TALK GETS CRAZIER - LDS Hymn Parody #124

There's a few blogs that I follow in the ExMormon online community, and one of them is Ward Gossip (written by Donna Banta who always has great insights, satirical and otherwise, into all things ExMormon). Earlier this year, Donna posted a two-part series of blog entries entitled, Why ExMormons Won't Leave the Church Alone.  What she said in those blog entries triggered my writing of Why Can't You Just Leave the Church Alone? (which was my 121st LDS Hymn Parody).  Now, again, a blog entry posted on Ward Gossip on December 19, 2015 has prompted me to write another LDS Hymn Parody.  That blog entry was entitled The Crazy Talk Gets Even Crazier - and that is so true!!  Just when you think it can't get crazier, it does. Mormons continue to blindly accept whatever they are told and will defend it even though what they are saying makes absolutely no sense. But even pointing that out doesn't do any good; they are so convinced of its "truth" that they seem comfortable in their ignorance.  When asked to simply exploration the possibility that what they are saying might not be true, they scoff and dig their heels in even harder.

What's sad is that I remember having that mindset.  When I was a devout Mormon, no one could convince me that it wasn't actually true.  Although I did have issues with certain aspects of Mormonism from an early age (which I put on my imaginary shelf), I nevertheless accepted it as the gospel truth and told myself that I just needed to be more humble; and that I also needed to pray more and read the scriptures more so I would be worthy to understand it all.  But even though I did those things, the issues I had remained, making me feel not only unworthy but also frustrated and extremely inadequate.  I look back on those times with complete disdain because I now know that I was chasing an elusive goal.

Amidst my questioning, as my imaginary shelf became more and more crowded with more and more issues until it was close to tumbling down, I finally did some research into Mormon Church History.  In doing so, I began to realize that Mormonism is simply not true. In time, I came to the conclusion that it is a completely bogus religion - and looking at it now, I ask myself how I could have accepted it for so long.  But then, hindsight is 20/20 and kicking yourself for past mindsets is futile.

So here is my 124th LDS Hymn Parody.  The crazy talk does keep getting crazier, but thank goodness I finally walked away and am no longer caught up in the ridiculous Mormon mindset (a/k/a denial) that made me think it wasn't crazy at all.

THE CRAZY TALK GETS CRAZIER

Sung to the tune of Come, Listen to a Prophet’s Voice - #21

1. The crazy talk gets crazier

As Mormons skirt the lies.
They will not see, it’s all a blur,
Deception in disguise.
They speak of truth yet just ignore
Whatever doesn’t fit.
It’s fraudulent right to its core,

A total pile of shit.

2. They say to simply doubt your doubts,
And cling to what they say.
But that is hard to figure out
Since facts get in the way.
There’s clearly lots of evidence
To prove deception deep,
But since they don’t use common sense,
They’ve all turned into sheep.

3. When questioning its truthfulness,
I finally saw the lies.
And now I see that it’s BS,
For truth, no compromise.
Deceit the Mormons try to spin
To camouflage the lies.
So obvious from deep within,
No matter its disguise.

4. Now due to my awakening,
I’m Mormonism free.
No longer to its lies I cling,
And I am finally ME.
The crazy talk gets crazier
With every passing day,
But now it’s gotten easier
To simply look away.

© Diane Tingen, 12/31/2015

IT IS NOT TRUE - LDS Hymn Parody #122

Here is my 122nd LDS Hymn Parody - and in keeping with the main theme of this blog, this one is entitled, "IT IS NOT TRUE." Looking back at my 52 years as a member of the Mormon Church, it still amazes me that I stayed for so long.  After all, I always had problems with some of the attitudes that are so prevalent within the Mormon Church, such as the obvious misogyny.  But naturally, I stuffed it down, telling myself that I just needed to be more humble.  You know, the old "if you pray more, study the scriptures more, attend church meetings more" ramble.  If I did all that, then I would gain more of the spirit and would better understand my place in the eternal scheme of things.  Of course, I also had problems with certain doctrines (such as polygamy), but whenever something like that came along, I just put it on my shelf and tried to ignore my doubts.

So I struggled for many years, stuffing certain things down and putting other things on my imaginary shelf.  It wasn't until I went on a Mormon Church History tour in the Summer of 2001, and decided to study church history so I would know more when we visited the key places that I began to realize that my lifelong religion is replete with sordid history. The problem was that the more I studied and researched, the more I began to see that Mormonism is also replete with bogus doctrine.  In reality, it is a complete fraud, very obviously made up by Joseph Smith (a shyster and charlatan), and perpetuated by many others since his death.

Arriving at the conclusion that IT IS NOT TRUE was not easy.  But relieving myself of the cognitive dissonance that I had been dealing with for so many years was very freeing - and living an authentic life for the past 10 years has been its own reward.  I'm so thankful to say that I am happier now than I have ever been.  A long road - but definitely worth it!!

So here is my newest LDS hymn parody.  Since the music for this hymn is not in the LDS Music Playlist (due to copyright considerations), I attached a video that I found on YouTube - this is a "rockin' version" of How Great Thou Art, which I think it much better than the other versions I found, most of which are way too schmaltzy (at least for my taste).

IT IS NOT TRUE

Sung to the tune of How Great Thou Art – #86

When I began

To question Mormon doctrine,
Consider all the things
That made no sense.
I saw the flaws,
I read the sordid history,
The lies throughout
For which there’s no defense.

[Chorus]
Within my soul,
I knew without a doubt,
It is not true,
It is not true.

Within my soul,
I knew without a doubt,
It is not true.
It is not true.

And so I left,
I closed the door completely,
Just walked away
And left it all behind.
The Mormon Church,
Replete with pure deception,
So clear to me,
I am no longer blind.

[Chorus]
Within my soul,
I know without a doubt,
It is not true,
It is not true.

Within my soul,
I know without a doubt,
It is not true.
It is not true.

© Diane Tingen, 11/10/2015

A STACK OF LIES - LDS Hymn Parody #120

Here's another LDS Hymn Parody - my 120th.  
This parody is to a song in the LDS Children's Songbook that I always really liked - very melodic.  Back in my Mormon days, I was Primary Chorister and Pianist, and this is a song that I liked to sing and play.  Within the lyrics of the original song, it says, "What does the Father ask of us?  What do the scriptures say?  Have faith, have hope, live like his Son, help others on their way. What does he ask?  Live like his Son."  Obviously, not bad advice.  

But, of course, when I looked at this song from my current ExMormon perspective, the parody became an entirely different song and the end result highlights the "stack of lies" that are, in  my opinion, at the very core of Mormonism.

The main thrust of this parody is that the Mormon Church is built on a stack of lies, and although TBMs have obviously been brainwashed into "just believing," the internet and Google are not available to help a person find the truth - and when a person does find the truth, the key to realizing what the real truth is found in thinking for yourself.  Critical thinking - analyzing all aspects of the subject matter and applying logic to it.  If a person does that, then he/she will know what's true and what isn't.  Plain and simple.

A STACK OF LIES

Sung to the tune of He Sent His Son - #34 (LDS Children’s Songbook)

What does the Mormon Church hold out as truth beyond compare?

A stack of lies, so fraudulent, deception everywhere.

How could the Mormon Church profess to be the Word of God?

It is not true, that’s very clear – it’s fake and just a fraud.

Why do the members of the church believe that it is true?

They have been brainwashed very well, they haven’t got a clue.

But now we have the Internet, and what does Google say?

Just find the truth, think for yourself, and simply walk away.

What does it say?  Think for yourself.

© Diane Tingen, 9/24/2015

COME, SEE ALL THE LIES - LDS Hymn Parody #119

Here's another LDS Hymn Parody - my 119th (so far).  I keep thinking that I've reached the end of the road on these parodies, but they keep popping into my head so I keep writing them down.  Of course, with the wealth of material contained within Mormonism itself, as well as all the lies, deceit and deception they put out there, I guess it's really not a surprise that I can keep going.

What surprises me, though, is that there are so many people who still believe it, especially given what's available on the internet these days.  But then it's hard to tell who really believes it and those that are just going along because of personal or family pressures.  We all know people who are sticking with it because they simply can't make the separation, mentally or physically.  The Mormon Church has brainwashed so many people into "just believing," or at least "just going along."  I find that very sad.  So glad I was able to make the break and start living an entirely authentic life.

And so, here is my 119th LDS hymn parody.  The original hymn is "Come, Sing to the Lord," and that sounds very religious (and very Mormon with the whole "latter days" thing).  But I think it's interesting that my hymn parody has taken on more of a "carnival barker" vibe as in "Come, See the Bearded Lady" or "Come, See the Freak Show."  Not that Mormons are freaks, but the fact that they adhere to such an obviously bogus religion with so many strange doctrines within it is freakish all on its own.  Oh well, to each his own, right???  As long as they keep it to themselves... which they don't, so...

Something else that I find interesting is that Joseph Smith bought the papyrus that he supposedly "translated" into the Book of Abraham from a "traveling mummy exhibition." Now that's something you might find at a carnival... oh, the correlations..

COME, SEE ALL THE LIES

Sung to the tune of Come, Sing to the Lord - #10

1. Come, see all the lies the Mormons tell,
And you will see all is not well
Within the Mormon Church.
And though they claim that it is true,
Come see all the lies, and get a clue.

2. The doctrine they teach and all they say,

From BOM to BOA,
Is clearly filled with lies.
And all the facts and evidence
Will show you the lies, there’s no defense.

3. When searching for truth, no compromise,
No cover-ups, not filled with lies,
I simply want the truth.
So to the Mormon Church I say,
Don’t take me to church, just go away.

© Diane Tingen, 9/21/2015

AMAZING LIES - Hymn Parody #118

Well, I wrote this hymn parody to Amazing Grace, and then discovered that it's not in the LDS Hymn Book.  I really thought it was, but I guess based on what the Mormon Church teaches about grace, they decided not to include it.  After all, the Book of Mormon talks about grace "after all we can do," emphasizing that grace alone does not save a person.

On Mormon.org, this appears on the page about GRACE:

The Book of Mormon teaches, "For we labor diligently to write to persuade our children, and also our brethren to believe in Christ, and to be reconciled to God; for we know that it is by grace we are saved after all we can do (2 Nephi 25:23).  A Book of Mormon prophet named Lehi taught, "There is no flesh that can dwell in the presence of God, save it be through the merits, and mercy, and grace of the Holy Messiah" (2 Nephi 2:8).

See this link:  https://www.mormon.org/faq/beliefs-on-grace 

But regardless of the fact that this beautiful hymn is not contained in the LDS Hymn Book, I decided to parody it for the ExMormon Hymn Book anyway since it's a well-known hymn in actual Christianity.

Some of the lyrics to Amazing Grace apply completely to my Exit from Mormonism, such as:
"I once was lost, but now am found, was blind, but now I see."  Believe me, that one line says a lot.

And yes, true to the title of this hymn parody, the lies encompassed within Mormonism are truly AMAZING - thanks mainly to the creative imagination of Joseph Smith.  As I have made very clear within this blog (as well as my book, Closing the Door on Mormonism: The AHA! Moments that Triggered my Awakening), it is my firm belief that Mormonism was made up from the get-go by "dear ol' Joe," and that it has been perpetuated through the years with the aid of many others.

In my opinion, not only were Brigham Young, Hyrum Smith, John Taylor, Martin Harris, Oliver Cowdery, and so on, accomplices to Joe's deception, but the current GAs in SLC are also complicit in the deception that is embodied within Mormonism.  I have no doubt but that they know for a fact that it is a complete fraud, but they keep hanging in there, defending it to their dying breaths, in order to get their share of the pie.

So I dedicate this hymn parody to all of the men (and women) who have worked so hard to preserve Mormonism to this day, as well as to all the TBMs who buy into the deception and keep paying their tithing, thereby lining the pockets of the 15 Mormon Men Who Call The Shots.

AMAZING LIES

Sung to the tune of Amazing Grace

Amazing lies the Mormons tell,
Say it’s the Word of God.
But if you look at what they sell,
So clearly it’s a fraud.

‘Twas lies that made me finally see
That truth is nowhere seen
Within their ideology,
Deceptiveness routine.

Through many struggles and discord,

I found myself confused.
‘Tis through the research I explored
My turmoil was defused.

The search for truth began for me
When doubt entered my mind.
Discovered sordid history,
Deception intertwined.

Though it was hard to close the door,
I knew I had no choice.
Denial gone, suppressed no more,

No silencing my voice.

Amazing lies the Mormons tell,
Say it’s the Word of God.
But if you look at what they sell,
So clearly it’s a fraud.

© Diane Tingen, 8/25/2015

THE VOICE OF REASON HAS BEEN HEARD - LDS Hymn Parody #117

Ah yes, the voice of reason has been heard - and thank goodness for that!!  Having been practically born and raised Mormon, I was programmed from a very early age not to doubt and to just believe. Critical thinking was never part of the equation. Of course, just accepting things that are told to you and not questioning or digging deeper is not wise. But that's what Mormons are taught to do.  I'm so glad I finally researched on my own to find the actual truth - that the Mormon Church is built on a stack of lies.

And so the cycle has been broken.  No longer am I clinging to a religion that is obviously bogus.  So yes, I rejoice my extrication every day, so thankful for my final disconnection.

THE VOICE OF REASON HAS BEEN HEARD

Sung to the tune of The Voice of God Again is Heard – #18

1. The voice of reason has been heard,

The cycle has been broken.
Effects of Mormonism gone,
The weight of such a burden.
Rejoice, all those who turn away,
Rejoice your extrication.
Begins anew this happy day
Of final disconnection.

2. The Mormon Church is built on lies,
Duplicity its story.
So clearly it is just a fraud,
But I believed it blindly
Until I opened up my eyes
And saw the truth unfolding.
No compromise for such a sham,
Deception overflowing.

© Diane Tingen
7/26/2015

THE 15 MORMON MEN WHO CALL THE SHOTS - LDS Hymn Parody #115

With yesterday's passing of Boyd K. Packer, I'm sure I'm not the only who is relieved that he won't be able to spread his unique brand of toxicity anymore.  But even aside from that perk, his passing has reminded me not only of all the horrible things he said during his many years on the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of the Mormon Church, but also the tenor and substance of the Top 15 General Authorities overall.  The fact is, this is a group of 15 elderly men who are completely out-of-touch with reality. They spew venom regularly and single out groups of people who they deem to be sinners and pass judgment on them. 

In an article that appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune on March 3, 2015, it was pointed out that
80 is the average age of the Top 15.  Just look at these ages:*

FIRST PRESIDENCY:

     Thomas S. Monson - 87.53 years

     Henry B. Eyring - 81.75 years

     Dieter F. Uchtdorf - 74.32 years

QUORUM OF THE TWELVE APOSTLES:

     Boyd K. Packer - 90.48 years (dec'd 7/3/2015)

     L. Tom Perry - 92.57 years (dec'd 5/30/2015)

     Russell M. Nelson - 90.48 years

     Dallin H. Oaks - 82.55 years

     M. Russell Ballard - 86.40 years

     Richard G. Scott - 86.32 years

     Robert D. Hales - 82.52 years

     Jeffrey R. Holland - 74.25 years

     David A. Bednar - 62.71 years

     Quentin L. Cook - 74.48 years

     D. Todd Christofferson - 70.10 years

     Neil L. Andersen - 63.56 years

*This list was from March 2015, so they are even older now.

In my opinion, that's a horrifying list - and not just because of their advanced ages.  Even aside from that obvious fact, the bottom line is that they are completely out-of touch and apparently refuse to see that they are increasingly alienating people with every passing day.  Sadly, even removing Boyd K. Packer from the group doesn't make it any more palatable. 

It should be interesting to see who BKP's replacement will be.  As far as I've been able to find, they haven't replaced L. Tom Perry yet.  But then, there are so many potential douchebags to choose from that I'm sure it's a hard decision for "the Lord" to make...

Of course, BKP was his own special brand of horrible and awful.  The ridiculous quotes are endless. Like when he said, "Some things that are true are not very useful."  Through this philosophy, he tried to whitewash not only the sordid history of the Mormon Church but also is bogus doctrines.  And of course there's the horrible things he said about gays and gay marriage.  So glad he lived long enough to see the Supreme Court make gay marriage legal in all 50 states!!  Maybe that was what finally put him over the edge...

And of course, since I'm of the firm belief that the Mormon Church is a total fraud, was a hoax from the beginning, is replete with deceptive doctrine, and is filled with lies made up by Joseph Smith, it's very clear to me that the Top 15 are perpetuating those lies for their own purposes.  They have all made a career out of "hocking" the Mormon Church, and most of them sit on various Boards of companies that make them a lot of money (such as Beneficial Life).  To publicly admit that they know it's a fraud would be financial death for them.  And God forbid they should have any degree of honesty and integrity. 

So here's my latest LDS hymn parody, dedicated to The 15 Mormon Men who deem themselves to be holier-than-thou, spout their venomous and condescending views at every opportunity they are given, and guard the Mormon Party Line (and their pocketbooks) with their very lives.

THE 15 MORMON MEN WHO CALL THE SHOTS TODAY

Sung to the tune of An Angel from on High - #13

The 15 Mormon Men

Who call the shots today
Are really just a joke
With all the games they play.
Enforcing laws and making rules
When they are just a bunch of tools.
Enforcing laws and making rules
When they are just a bunch of tools.

There’s Monson and Uchtdorf,
And Eyring at the top.
With others in the Twelve,
A truly a frightful crop.
They’re out of touch and very old,
Their hands and hearts extremely cold.
They’re out of touch and very old,
Their hands and hearts extremely cold.

It’s very clear to see
That all the 15 men
Know surely it’s a fraud
But they all say Amen.
They spew the Mormon Party Line
As truthfulness they redefine.
They spew the Mormon Party Line
As truthfulness they redefine.

With Boyd K. Packer gone,
His reign of terror through.
A truly dreadful man
Who ugliness would spew.
And all the awful things he said,
His legacy now that he’s dead.
And all the awful things he said,
His legacy now that he’s dead.

But in the Mormon Church,
Such venom is revered.
And those like BKP
Are not considered weird.
And so the others follow course,
And ride the same old tired horse.
And so the others follow course,
And ride the same old tired horse.

© Diane Tingen
7/4/2015

RESEARCHING ON GOOGLE - LDS Hymn Parody #114

Lately, I seem to be on a Google kick more than ever. I just posted a song parody that I wrote based on a classic Eagles song (Lyin' Ways) that references Google, and now I've written a new LDS hymn parody about researching on Google. Of course, the fact that Google is so incredibly awesome is the reason I promote it so much. Truly, a person can find just about anything on Google... and it sure helps with researching difficult questions.

With advent of the internet and the invention of Google (as well as other search engines), it has become very difficult for certain truths to be covered up and hidden (as they were in the past). Looking back at my 52 years in the Mormon Church, I really wish there had been Google way back when. It really would have helped and would have made it so much easier to find out the reality of the sordid history of the Mormon Church and its bogus doctrines. Perhaps I would have left the church even earlier...

Of course, there are those who want people to think that Google doesn't have all the answers. Such as religions and churches (and cults). Google is a gateway to true knowledge, though, whether or not religious leaders want to admit that. After all, it isn't Google itself that has the answers - it just gives people places to look to provide answers to questions that are perplexing them. In my opinion, that's a VERY good thing.

So thank you, Google, for providing questioning people with so many avenues to explore and find answers. You really are awesome!! 

RESEARCHING ON GOOGLE

Sung to the tune of Redeemer of Israel – #6

Researching on Google,
The internet age,
On whom for true knowledge we call.

The evidence shown
By the all-knowing sage,
Through you, we uncover it all.

We know you are showing
The truth to us all,
And our lives are much better now.
No longer we’re banging
Our heads on the wall,

So here at our keyboards we bow.

How long we have wondered
Why we just believed
In the Mormon Church for so long.
But through our research
We’re no longer deceived,
By using your engine so strong.

As users of Google,
Good findings for us,
The benefits offered are clear.
Whatever we seek,
You’re a total genius,
To Google, we give a big cheer!!!

© Diane Tingen, 6/16/2015

SMART WOMAN!!

THE EVIDENCE IS THERE - LDS Hymn Parody #113

Here is another LDS Hymn Parody - my 113th.  I'm not sure how many more I'm going to able to write since I've done so many of the familiar ones already.  But I'm going to keep going until I run out of steam. After all, they're just asking for it...

This hymn parody is entitled THE EVIDENCE IS THERE - and it truly is.  Mountains of evidence against the Mormon Church being true.  Facts galore supporting my hypothesis that Mormonism is completely bogus. Again, I'm sure I sound like a broken record, but so be it.  I have cited the evidence over and over in this blog - and it is available in many sources.  Google is a good start. Accepting anything that you're told to believe without doing your own research is not wise. Critical thinking is tantamount to forming a person's own opinions and basing them on actual facts, not blind faith and a admonition to "just believe."  Really, THE EVIDENCE IS THERE - if Mormons would pay attention to it rather than simply buying the party line.

The original hymn (An Angel from on High) was written by Parley P. Pratt (1807-1857) who was, in my opinion, one of the biggest sleazes in the early days of the Mormon Church as well as one of the biggest perpetrators of the lies that encompass Mormonism.  He was also one of the men who participated in both Polygamy and Polyandry.  In fact, he was murdered in 1857 by Hector McLean, the estranged husband of his 12th wife (Eleanor McLean) (estranged meaning they weren't divorced, so it was a polyandrous marriage). 

There is a lot of information about Parley P. Pratt on the internet.  Some people call him a religious martyr, and Brigham Young apparently thought of him in that category along with Joseph Smith and Hyrum Smith, both of whom died in Carthage Jail.  But in my opinion, calling him a religious martyr is ridiculous.  Having been murdered by the estranged husband of a woman he had married and had helped to keep her children from their father does not make him a martyr.  In fact, Hector McLean pressed criminal charges against Parley P. Pratt, saying that he had aided Eleanor in the kidnapping of his children. The result of the subsequent trial (in Arkansas) was an acquittal due to lack of evidence. Shortly after his release, Pratt was shot and stabbed by Hector (on May 13, 1957) on a farm northeast of Van Buren, Arkansas.  Some writings, though, say that Hector was aided in the killing by at least two other men.  They have been otherwise characterized as "a small Arkansas band antagonistic toward Pratt's teachings," which in my opinion is a total fabrication designed by the Mormon faction.

From what I've read, Pratt's death may have also played a part in events that lead up to the Mountain Meadows Massacre a few months later.  There were a number of people in the party who were from Arkansas, and it was rumored that some present had participated in Pratt's murder.  Apparently, in this way members of the Mormon Church rationalized out the horrendous circumstances of the Mountain Meadows Massacre.

Interestingly, Parley P. Pratt was the great-great-grandfather of Mitt Romney, and the great-great-great grandfather of Jon Huntsman.  As mentioned above, Pratt practiced plural marriage and had 12 wives, 30 children, and 266 grandchildren.  In 2011, Pratt's living descendants were estimated to number between 30,000 and 50,000.

So much for background.  Here's my 113th LDS Hymn Parody.  My advice to TBMs is that the evidence really is there, so at least look at it - and consider it.  Really, a little bit of critical thinking goes a long way...

THE EVIDENCE IS THERE

Sung to the tune of An Angel from on High - #13

The evidence is there,
The facts are clear to see,
And no amount of prayer
Can change its history.
No, Mormonism is not true,
It was made up by Joseph Smith.
No, Mormonism is not true,
It was made up by Joseph Smith.

When I began to doubt
And question what they say,
I had to check it out,
And all the details weigh.
So as I researched carefully,
The lies were very clear to me.
So as I researched carefully,
The lies were very clear to me.

The lies are laced throughout,
Deception to the core.
There really is no doubt,
That’s why I closed the door.
They say have faith and just believe,
But all the while they do deceive.
They say have faith and just believe,
But all the while they do deceive.

No matter what they say,
It is a stack of lies.
And so I walked away,
With truth no compromise.
On Mormonism closed the door,
Deception I cannot ignore.
On Mormonism closed the door,
Deception I cannot ignore.

© Diane Tingen, 5/6/2015

BECAUSE I FOUND THE TRUTH AT LAST - LDS Hymn Parody #110

Here's my 110th LDS Hymn Parody.  110 has been my goal for quite some time, and there for a while, I didn't think I was going to make it - but I did!!  I'm not sure why I haven't parodied this hymn before this except that the music for it is not on the list of LDS hymns on their website because of "copyright issues." But, naturally, with the internet as expansive as it is today, I was able to find the music on YouTube, and there is a link to that version below.

Of course, the words to this parody expound on a recurring theme in many of my writings, the fact that Mormonism is replete with lies and deception.  The fact that I went along my entire life, believing what I was taught, and that it wasn't until much later in my life (beginning when I was 52) that I did actual research on my own and discovered that I had been duped all along.  Yes, I was complacent, and I regret that now.  But on the other hand, at least I'm not spending my entire life trapped behind the Mormon Curtain.

BECAUSE I FOUND THE TRUTH AT LAST

Sung to the tune of Because I Have Been Given Much - #219

Because I found the truth at last, I had to leave.
Because of all the lies, the fact that they deceive,
I had to turn and walk away,
So very clear I could not stay,
I’m done with all the games they play.

Because the Mormon Church is filled with many lies,
The truth behind it all they think they can disguise.
But if you look, you might agree,
And though it was a shock to me,
So glad that I am finally free.

Because I finally did some research on my own,
And finally saw the lies I should have always known.
Too many years, I went along,
And now I know that I was wrong
To be complacent for so long.

© Diane Tingen

1/23/2015

CAST DECEPTION AND LIES ASIDE - LDS Hymn Parody #109

The hardest part of my journey away from Mormonism was going from discovering the truth to wallowing in denial for a very long time until I finally faced the truth and realized that I had to extricate myself from its grasp.  From the moment I began to seriously doubt, after discovering so much about the sordid history of the Mormon Church and how its founder ("good ole Joe") had duped so many people, I developed cognitive dissonance to the max.  Looking back, it astounds me that I remained TBM for so long.  After all, if anyone uses any amount of critical thinking, then they can't help but question what the Mormon Church teaches as fact.  But that is an enormous conundrum.  How do they get relatively intelligent people to swallow it all?  People who use critical thinking in other areas of their lives but do not apply it to the teachings of Mormonism at all?  It boggles my mind.

Sadly, I think there are a lot of people still active within Mormonism who are caught in the middle, between a rock and a hard place, still trying to wrap their minds around the fact that Mormonism is built on a huge stack of lies.  That is not an easy premise to accept, particularly if they have been "in it" for many years or perhaps even their entire lives (like me, who finally left when I was 54 years old after being raised in the Mormon Church from infancy).  

Of course, it doesn't help the situation when the Mormon Mantra is echoing loudly in your mind - the mantra that if you are experiencing doubts, then it's you, not the Mormon Church.  That mantra is drummed into the consciousness of every member so much that they have learned to accept many things as gospel truth that are so far off the actual spectrum of truth that it's frightening.

Despite all that, though, I got away - and I have never been happier.  I am walking my own path, free from the constraints of a religion that plays so fast and loose with the truth that it bears no resemblance to any measure of fact.  It is in that spirit that I wrote the below LDS hymn parody (my 109th).  Cast deception and lies aside.  Not an easy thing to do, but it's rewards are immeasurable.

CAST DECEPTION AND LIES ASIDE

Sung to the tune of Cast Thy Burden upon the Lord ‑ #110

Cast deception and lies aside,

And live more authentic.
Why cling to a church overflowing with lies?
Only truth is worthwhile.
The truth will set you free
To live the way you want.
Let none be made ashamed
That walk their own path.

© Diane Tingen
11/8/2014

CAN'T YOU SEE IT'S ALL DECEPTION? LDS Hymn Parody #107

Here's another LDS Hymn Parody - the 107th one I've written.  After apparently having writer's block for the first few months of 2014, I seemed to have emerged from that dry spell (at least for now).

The LDS hymn to which this parody was written is lesser known and not often sung (at least in my experience).  Evan Stephens (1854-1930) was the composer of the music to this hymn, and he was the composer of more than 15 hymns contained in the LDS Hymnal (such as more well-known hymns like Let us All Press On (words and music); For the Strength of the Hills (music); True to the Faith (words and music); and others).  He served as the director of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir for 26 years, and wrote "Utah, We Love Thee," which became the official state song in 1937.

On the other hand, the words to this hymn were written by John S. Davis (1813-1882), and this was the only LDS hymn for which he wrote words.  

With those facts in mind, I'm sure neither of these men would like the fact that I have written "other words" for this hymn.  Who can blame them?  I'm sure they were both devout members of the Mormon Church and worked hard to make a lasting contribution to their religion.  But they lived back in an era when actual facts about the Mormon Church were not readily available from such sources as the Internet today.  I'm sure they relied on what they were told (as well as their "feelings"), which is understandable in their day and age.  But today, with all the information that is so easily accessible (via Google, for instance), it is so much harder to believe that so many people are duped into believing that what the Mormon Church exposes as true and factual.
  
Doing independent research is so important.  Relying on what a religious organization tells you, rather than finding out for yourself on your own, is simply not wise.  Sadly, though, that's what so many Mormons do.  They accept what is taught within Mormonism as the gospel truth without even questioning it.  That's why I ask, "Can't You See It's All Deception?"

CAN’T YOU SEE IT’S ALL DECEPTION?

Sung to the tune of What Was Witnessed in the Heavens? #11

1.  Can’t you see it’s all deception?

Was made up by Joseph Smith.
Are there facts that tell the story?
Yes, it’s nothing but a myth.
Fraudulent, replete with fiction,
Obvious, by research shown.
Joseph Smith was not a Prophet,
As a charlatan was known.

2.  So there’s lies in Mormonism?
Yes, it’s filled with much deceit.
But they say to just believe it?
That’s a catchphrase they repeat.
Please examine every doctrine,
And the sordid history.
Study for yourself each aspect
So they’ll be no mystery.

3.  For so long I just believed it,
Went along with everything.
Just accepted what they told me,
And to falsehoods I would cling.
But one day, I started looking
At it all with open eyes.
Soon discovered all the falsehoods,
For the truth no compromise.

© Diane Tingen, 4/30/2014

TRUTH IS THE SOUL'S SINCERE DESIRE - LDS Hymn Parody #105

To me, it all boils down to truth.  Is something true or isn't it?  If it isn't true, then it's false and a lie.  And if that's the case, I have no use for it.  When doing research about Mormon Church history, I uncovered an enormous stack of lies - and that was something I couldn't accept.  Once I made that discovery, my days were numbered in the Mormon Church.  After a while, I came to believe that Joseph Smith made the whole thing up from the get-go - and at the same time, I came to the conclusion that the Mormon Church is a complete fraud.

Truth is my soul's sincere desire as I think it should be for everyone.  Occasionally I get into discussions with people on various internet discussion boards, and it always surprises me when Mormons say that they know the history of the Mormon Church and accept it as the truth anyway.  That mindset makes no sense and simply does not compute for me.

And so, here is my 105th LDS Hymn Parody, dedicated to that premise.

TRUTH IS THE SOUL’S SINCERE DESIRE
Sung to the tune of Prayer is the Soul’s Sincere Desire ‑#145

Truth is the soul’s sincere desire,
Honesty undefiled.
For truthfulness, we should aspire,
Deception so reviled.

Lies are a burden to behold,
Discovering the fraud.
The insight that deceits withhold
Reveal the false façade.

While Mormonism claims to be
The one true church of God,
To me it’s clear, so plain to see
It’s really just a fraud.

It’s obvious the Mormon Church
Is laced with lies, no doubt,
Disguised deceit, but through research
The truth I figured out.

History sordid, filled with lies,
Deception to its core.
For truth there is no compromise,
And falsehoods I can’t ignore.

But sadly, Mormons still adhere
To what they’re told is true.
The prophets false they still revere
Though they should say adieu.

Mormons are told to just believe,
And many go along,
To the deceits they are naïve,
Not knowing they are wrong.

Someday I hope they’ll see the light,
Recognize the disguise.
Finally see what’s true and right,
Everything truth belies.

© Diane Tingen, 12/18/2013

BEWARE OF DECEPTION - LDS Hymn Parody #104

So here's another LDS Hymn Parody - #104.  Since it's very self-explanatory, I won't go into a long dissertion on what I have concluded are the lies and deception at the very core and foundation of Mormonism.  Suffice it to say that my opinion about the Mormon Church being a fraudulent religious organization has only become stronger as the years have gone on since I first began my independent research over 10 years ago.  But then if you've read this blog, that opinion is very obvious.

BEWARE OF DECEPTION
Sung to the tune of Today, While the Sun Shines ‑ #229

1.  Beware of deception, think for yourself,
Don’t shove all your issues up there on a shelf.
Beware what they tell you, don’t go along
With what they’re saying, totally wrong.

(Chorus)
Beware, beware, think for yourself,
Beware, beware, the crumbling shelf.
Beware, beware, you should not delay,
Don’t think Mormonism is just what they say.

2.  Beware when they tell you to just believe
Since if you look closely, it’s clear they deceive.
The history sordid, doctrines untrue,
But many Mormons don’t have a clue.

(Chorus)
Beware, beware, think for yourself,
Beware, beware, the crumbling shelf.
Beware, beware, you should not delay,
Don’t think Mormonism is just what they say.

3.  Beware of apostates, Mormons exclaim,
They label us Anti, say we are to blame
For whatever caused us to go astray,
Closing their minds in utter dismay.

(Chorus)
Beware, beware, do some research,
Beware, beware of the Mormon Church.
Beware, beware, you should not delay,
It’s clear Mormonism is not what they say.

4.  Beware of religion that’s filled with lies
Because for the truth there is no compromise.
Examine it closely, and evidence
Will show the facts for there’s no defense.

(Chorus)
Beware, beware, not Word of God,
Beware, beware, for it’s just a fraud.
Beware, beware of the Mormon Way,
It’s clear Mormonism is not what they say.

© Diane Tingen, 11/25/2013