LDS Hymn Parodies - I

I AM A CHILD OF GOD
LDS Hymn Book, #301

I am a child of God,
Or so the Christians say.
But I don’t know if God exists,
They say I’ve gone astray.


(Chorus)
Reasoning has got me thinking,
Questioning it all.
Blindly just accepting it,
For that, I will not fall.


Am I a child of God?
The query gives me pause.
There’s nothing wrong with questioning
Religion and its flaws.


(Chorus)
Reasoning, not just accepting
Everything that’s said.
Going down the garden path,
I’ll use my brain instead.


So if there’s not a God,
No higher power there.
Would knowing that destroy your life
And fill you with despair?


(Chorus)
Reasoning and analyzing,
Thinking on my own.
Not believing what I’m told,
I will not be a clone.


I am a woman first,
On me I can rely.
So whether there’s a God or not,
Myself I can’t deny.


(Chorus)
Reasoning, no blind acceptance,
Not belief by force.
Using my free agency,
The best and safest course.


© Diane Tingen, 7/8/2011


I AM NOT ALONE
Sung to the tune of I Believe in Christ, #134

I am not alone, there’s many more
Who see the truth and close the door
On what the Mormon Church believes
And what they’re hiding up their sleeves.
I am not alone, I see the lies,
The false pretense they can’t disguise.
It’s all made up, enormous fraud,
The Mormon Church is not of God.

I am not alone, deceit is plain,
I’m not a fool, I use my brain.
My common sense is telling me
To run away and let it be.
I am not alone, though they will say
That I have tossed it all away.
But to the lies I can’t adhere,
I won’t remain because of fear.

I am not alone, and in my soul,
I finally feel completely whole.
The questioning tore me apart,
There was a hole within my heart.
I am not alone, the truth revealed
What all the lies had once concealed.
And now I know with certainty
That I cannot a Mormon be.

© Diane Tingen, 11/14/2011



I FINALLY SAW THE LIES
Sung to the tune of We Give Thee But Thine Own - #218
I finally saw the lies
Within the Mormon Church.
Deception they cannot disguise,
The truth for which I search.
For way too many years,
I tried to just believe.
But after shedding many tears,
I saw how they deceive.
The Prophet Joseph Smith
Created such a fraud.
So obvious it’s just a myth,
And not the Word of God.
And so, I walked away,
Rejected the deceit.
For in the end, I could not stay
Apostasy complete.
© Diane Tingen, 12/18/12


I KNOW IN MY HEART IT’S A FRAUD
I was baptized in the Mormon Church
When I was a girl of 8.
I did not know all the doctrines then,
But there would be no debate.
For I was brought up to believe it all,
The only true church of God.
But looking more closely, it was so clear,
I know in my heart it’s a fraud.
(Chorus)
I know in my heart it’s a fraud for sure,
Filled with lies, it’s so plain to see.
So glad that I finally broke the mold,
I can be who I want to be.
I was a sheep for so many years,
I tried to just go along.
And even though I would question things,
I knew that I must be wrong.
For if I would study the scriptures more,
And pray more sincerely to God,
Then answers would come which eluded me,
But that process is hugely flawed.
(Chorus)
I know in my heart it’s a fraud for sure,
Filled with lies, it’s so plain to see.
So glad that I finally broke the mold,
I can be who I want to be.
Don’t hold me back, I have found my voice,
And I will not quiet be.
For I must say what is in my heart,
Won’t go away silently.
I know Mormonism is not the truth,
Created by Joseph Smith,
And if it's examined with careful eyes,
So apparent it's all a myth.

(Chorus)
I know in my heart it’s a fraud for sure,
Filled with lies, it’s so plain to see.
So glad that I finally broke the mold,
I can be who I want to be.
© Diane Tingen, 10/28/2011



I KNOW THAT JOSEPH LIED
Sung to the tune of I Need Thee Every Hour, #98


I know that Joseph lied,
So very clear.
And I could not remain,
To lies adhere.


(Chorus)
A liar, yes, a liar,
Nothing but a liar.
Oh, why can’t Mormons see it?
He conned us all.


I know that Joseph lied,
Did not see God.
And so the Mormon Church
Is just a fraud.


(Chorus)
A liar, yes, a liar,
Nothing but a liar.
Oh, why can’t Mormons see it?
So very clear.


I know that Joseph lied,
There is no doubt.
Though once I did believe
And was devout…


(Chorus)
I know he was a liar,
Nothing but a liar.
The man was not a Prophet,
So very clear.


I know that Joseph lied,
For his own ends.
And all the doctrine taught
My mind offends.


(Chorus)
A liar, yes, a liar,
Joseph was a liar.
Oh, why can’t Mormons see it?
So very clear.


Diane Tingen, 2/5/2012


I KNOW THAT MORMONISM FAILS
Sung to the tune of I Know That My Redeemer Lives, #136

I know that Mormonism fails,
In every one of its details.
And so I’d like to scream and shout,
It’s false beyond a shred of doubt.


(Chorus)
I cannot live the Mormon Way,
They bow their heads and just obey.
But if they’d open up their eyes,
The lies they just might recognize.


I know that none of it makes sense,
And there is not a good defense
For all the lies that they disperse
As they recite each scripture verse.


(Chorus)
I used to love the Mormon Church,
But then I did my own research.
It was made up by Joseph Smith,
So clear that it is just a myth.


So long I tried to just believe,
Tried to have faith, could not conceive
That it is laced with such deceit,
With lies and falsehoods it’s replete.


(Chorus)
For none of what they say is true,
And so my disillusion grew.
Could not believe it anymore,
And so, I finally closed the door.


I know that it is filled with lies
And there can be no compromise
Because the truth is what I seek,
And all their arguments are weak.

(Chorus)
With Mormonism I am through
Because I know it isn’t true.
They say that it’s the Word of God,
But now I know it’s just a fraud.

© Diane Tingen, 2/5/2012


I SIT OUTSIDE THE TEMPLE

Sung to the tune of I Love to See the Temple,
LDS Children's Songbook, #95


I sit outside the temple,
My daughter’s getting wed.
I long to be there with her,
To hear their vows be said.
But I can’t go in this house of God,
A place where few can enter,
Even though I worship Jesus Christ,
Oh yes, he is my Savior.


I know the path she’s chosen,
But such a special day,
Should not be so exclusive,
This is the price I pay
For not worshipping the way she does,
Since I am not a Mormon,
But if there was just some other way
That felt much more like heaven.


The temple’s very sacred
To Mormons everywhere,
But weddings without families
Seems totally unfair.
But I sit outside the temple now,
And think about the wedding,
Trying hard to wait here patiently,
Although my heart is aching.


If only they would hear me,
And change the way it’s done,
Allow a civil wedding
And then the temple one.
They would help keep families unified
Although they are not Mormon,
And if they would make this compromise,
They’d show that they are Christian.


© Diane Tingen and Jean Bodie, 7/4/2011


I STAND ALL AMAZED
Sung to the tune of I Stand All Amazed, #193

I stand all amazed at the shit Mormons pushed on me,
Confused at the lies that they buy into mindlessly.
I shutter to think that I once was a TBM,
That I once believed it, but now I’m not one of them.


Chorus:
Oh, it is wonderful
That I could see the light,
Enough to know what’s right.
Oh, it is wonderful,
Wonderful to me.


I marvel that finally I saw it’s a pile of crap,
So grateful to know I was able to spring the trap.
That I should extend my distaste for its doctrines now,
Sufficient to voice all its ills, this I do avow.


Chorus:
Oh, it is wonderful
That I could recognize
The fact that it’s all lies.
Oh, it is wonderful,
Wonderful to me.


I think of the years when I struggled to go to church,
Such torture, such hate and repulsion I do besmirch.
No, no, I will party and do what the hell I please,
Until I am falling down drunk at a few orgies.


Chorus:
Oh, it is wonderful,
That I am finally free
To live life blissfully.
Oh, it is wonderful,
Wonderful to me.


© Diane Tingen, 5/25/2011


IF LIES ARE LACED THROUGHOUT IT ALL
Sung to the tune of O Love That Glorifies the Son, #295

If lies are laced throughout it all,
If lies are written on the wall,
Those lies will be its sure downfall.
Why don’t they want to know?
Why don’t they want to know?


Why do they cling to what they’re told
And all of the apostates scold?
There’s lies throughout what they’ve been sold.
Why do they close their eyes?
Why do they close their eyes?


They hide their heads deep in the sand,
And say that they don’t understand
Why we have taken such a stand
Against the Mormon Church,
Against the Mormon Church.


Instead of saying we besmirch
The doctrines of the Mormon Church,
Why don’t they do their own research?
Perhaps they’d find the truth,
Perhaps they’d find the truth.


They ask us why we can’t move on,
To Mormonism we are drawn,
They want us all to just be gone,
To simply go away,
To simply go away.


Apostates who have broken free,
Who all the lies so plainly see,
Our voices cannot silent be,
Or it will be for naught,
Or it will be for naught.


© Diane Tingen, 8/7/2011


IF YOU COULD HIE TO UTAH
Sung to the tune of If You Could Hie To Kolob, #284

If you could hie to Utah
And the Mormons were not there,
No missionaries tracting,
No one on Temple Square.
Do you think that Salt Lake City
Would seem more comfortable
Without the Mormons preaching
Their doctrines and gospel?


Look at the “grand beginning”
When con man Joseph Smith
Made up his own religion,
Creating such a myth.
Methinks that Joseph tricked them,
Defrauding one and all,
Translating so-called scripture,
Unmitigated gall.


The works of Mormonism
Displayed so blatantly.
Trickery and deception
Are very plain to see.

There is no end to bullshit,
There is no end to crap,
There is no end to drivel,
It is a mindless trap.


There is no end to nonsense,
There is no end to tripe,
There is no end to hooey,
There is no end to hype,
There is no end to blather,
There is no end to bunk,
There is no end to hogwash,
It is a piece of junk.


There is no end to crazy,
There is no end to trash,
There is no end to flimflam,
It’s simply balderdash.
There is no end to crazy,
There is no end to trash,
There is no end to flimflam,
It’s simply balderdash.


© Diane Tingen, 6/3/2011




IF YOU JUST GO ALONG
Sung to the tune of Let Us Oft Speak Kind Words - #232

If you just go along and don’t question,
Accept what they say to believe,
Every piece of the dubious doctrine,
Denying they work to deceive.
Allowing the church to entrap you,
As in Mormonism you stay,
Not looking at each contradiction,
But giving your power away.
(Chorus)
It’s so clear if you look, Joseph Smith was a crook,
And he made it up from the start.
So don’t just go along, ask some questions,
Do research and take it to heart.
Looking back, I can see the denial,
With sorrow, I sadly recall
When some doubts would arise, I would squelch them,
I blindly accepted it all.
But finally, I started to question
In earnest, my research began.
And soon I could see Mormonism
Was made up by one twisted man.
(Chorus)
It’s so clear if you look, Joseph Smith was a crook,
And he made it up from the start.
So don’t just go along, ask some questions,
Do research and take it to heart.
© Diane Tingen, 2/23/2013


IF YOU LOOK OBJECTIVELY
Sung to the tune of I Have Enough Work to Do - #224

If you look objectively,
You will find the truth.
Do some research carefully,
You will find the truth.
Every question will be answered
That by which you have been bothered,
All the qualms that you have whispered,
You will find the truth.

If the doctrines you appraise,
As you seek the truth,
As you sort through Mormon ways,
When you seek the truth.
Every time you have felt censored,
Each resentment you have harbored,
As for comfort you have hungered
When you seek the truth.

If you open up your eyes,
As you seek the truth,
You’ll see there’s no compromise
As you seek the truth.
Every time you have felt pressured
By the issues you have pondered,
As your confidence is bolstered,
You will find the truth.

If you see that it’s a fraud,
As you seek the truth,
Recognize its false façade,
As you seek the truth.
When you see the lies you’ve weathered,
You may feel your world is shattered,
But you’ll see it’s truth that mattered,
When you find the truth.

© Diane Tingen, 5/24/2013


I’M FREE FROM MORMONISM NOW
Sung to the tune of God Loved Us, So He Sent His Son, #187

I’m free from Mormonism now,
And to it all, I won’t kowtow.
I saw the lies throughout it all,
My testimony’s quick downfall.


The Mormon Church is in my past,
So happy to be free at last.
It is not true, a total fraud,
Though Mormons say it comes from God.


They close their eyes and just believe,
So faithful and yet so naïve.
Not facing what the truth might be,
But he is blind who will not see.


Through research I could see the lies,
Deception they cannot disguise.
Life’s short so we must seize each day,
Not in a false religion stay.


© Diane Tingen, 02/20/2012


IN THE MORMON CHURCH
Sung to the tune of Love at Home, #294

There is nonsense all around
In the Mormon Church.
There is blab in every sound
In the Mormon Church.
Farce and blather there abide,
Concrete facts are all denied,
And the truth across they slide
In the Mormon Church.


In the doctrine, there are lies
In the Mormon Church.
Pure deception, no surprise,
In the Mormon Church.
Reasoning, you shouldn’t try,
Common sense, just say goodbye,
Normal rules do not apply
In the Mormon Church.


Lots of mindless clones and sheep
In the Mormon Church.
And the foolishness runs deep
In the Mormon Church.
Try to tell them, does no good,
Can’t get through, but wish I could,
Logic is not understood
In the Mormon Church.


It's just gibberish they teach
In the Mormon Church.
But for truth they will not reach
In the Mormon Church.

Burning in your bosom now,
Means your brain shut down, and how.

To it all, you must kowtow
In the Mormon Church.


© Diane Tingen, 6/15/2011


IS THERE TRUTH IN MORMONISM?

Sung to the tune of Guide Us, O Thou Great Jehovah, #83

Is there truth in Mormonism?
Many think it’s filled with lies.
Just look at the sordid history,
Countless questions will arise.
Look for answers, look for answers,
Search until you find the truth,
Find the truth.
Search until you find the truth.


They want you to blindly follow
What they tell you to believe.
If it’s false, the landscape changes,
You should know if they deceive.
Mormonism, Mormonism,
There is more than meets the eye,
Meets the eye.
There is more than meets the eye.


Though they tell you not to research,
Only read what they approve.
You must study independent,
Any doubts you must remove.
Information, information,
If you look, you’ll find the truth,
Find the truth.
If you look, you’ll find the truth.


© Diane Tingen, 5/16/2012


IT DOESN'T MATTER
Sung to the tune of Though Deepening Trials, #122

It doesn't matter what they say,
I know it’s not the Word of God.
It was made up by Joseph Smith,
The Mormon Church, a total fraud,
The Mormon Church, a total fraud.

They will not look with open eyes,
Follow along and just believe.
Clinging to faith, they say it’s true,
Simply not wise, and so naïve,
Simply not wise, and so naïve.


When I began my questioning,
It was not hard to see the lies.
History shows the sordid facts,
Open your eyes, there’s no disguise.
Open your eyes, there’s no disguise.


© Diane Tingen, 10/17/2012




IT IS NOT TRUE
Sung to the tune of How Great Thou Art – #86

When I began
To question Mormon doctrine,
Consider all the things
That made no sense.
I saw the flaws,
I read the sordid history,
The lies throughout
For which there’s no defense.

[Chorus]
Within my soul,
I knew without a doubt,
It is not true,
It is not true.

Within my soul,
I knew without a doubt,
It is not true.
It is not true.

And so I left,
I closed the door completely,
Just walked away
And left it all behind.
The Mormon Church,
Replete with pure deception,
So clear to me,
I am no longer blind.

[Chorus]
Within my soul,
I know without a doubt,
It is not true,
It is not true.

Within my soul,
I know without a doubt,
It is not true.
It is not true.


© Diane Tingen, 11/10/2015



IT IS SO APPARENT
Sung to the tune of We Are All Enlisted - #250

1.  It is so apparent that it’s packed full of lies,
The Mormon Church, The Mormon Church.
They can try to mask it, but there is no disguise,
Found out when I did my own research.
Studied the details, found out the truth,
Wish I had done that back in my youth.
A devout Mormon for many years,
Then broke away, broke away, shedding many tears.


(Chorus)
It is so apparent that it’s packed full of lies,
The Mormon Church, the Mormon Church.
They can try to mask it, but there is no disguise,
So apparent when you do research.


2.  When I did my research, the deception was clear,
Opened my eyes, opened my eyes.
Full of fabrications, not as it would appear,
Knew right then that I had not been wise.
They said believe it, I followed suit,
So very faithful, did not dispute.
Blindly accepted what they would say,
Until I saw, til I saw, much to my dismay…


(Chorus)
It is so apparent that it’s packed full of lies,
The Mormon Church, the Mormon Church.
They can try to mask it, but there is no disguise,
So apparent when you do research.


3.  After all the heartache, I am finally free,
Mormon no more, Mormon no more.
No more heavy burden, I am free to be me,
On my life before, I closed the door.
Should have been wiser, not just a clone,
Could have been different if I had known.
Critical thinking, a better choice,
And finally, finally, I have found my voice.


(Chorus)
It is so apparent that it’s packed full of lies,
The Mormon Church, the Mormon Church.
They can try to mask it, but there is no disguise,
So apparent when you do research.


© Diane Tingen, 5/21/2013

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