ExMormon Hymn Book: 50th LDS Hymn Parody

Friday, December 9, 2011

50th LDS Hymn Parody

OK, this is my 50th LDS hymn parody. Pretty cool, huh??!! Now I gotta set a new goal...

As far as this LDS hymn parody goes, I think it's pretty much self-explanatory. YOU CAN MAKE THE FUTURE BRIGHT if you leave the Mormon Church - and your life will be much, much better. I can say that with certainty because that's what I have experienced. Truly... the future's so bright, I gotta wear shades!

Obviously, there are obstacles in any chosen path, including people telling you that you've chosen the wrong fork in the road. But there are a multitude of rewards in store for those who follow their conscience and assert their individuality. Knowing for sure that the Mormon Church is built on a stack of lies, I know there is no other path available for me. Staying with a religion that is obviously false was not an option for me. Staying true to myself was the only thing I could do.

Those are my words of wisdom for the day. And here is my 50th LDS hymn parody...

YOU CAN MAKE THE FUTURE BRIGHT

Sung to the tune of You Can Make the Pathway Bright, #228

You can make the future bright,
And it will be out-of-sight,
If you leave the Mormon Church.
If it fills you with dismay,
It is worth the price you’ll pay,
If you leave the Mormon Church today.

(CHORUS)

If you leave the Mormon Church,
They will say you went astray,
Gave eternal life away.
And the guilt trip they will play,
If you leave the Mormon Church today.

Though the scriptures they’ll recite
As they try with all their might
To defend the Mormon Church.
They’ll insist that you must pray,
Push the evil one away,
If you leave the Mormon Church today.

(CHORUS)

If you leave the Mormon Church,
They will say you went astray,
Gave eternal life away.
And the guilt trip they will play,
If you leave the Mormon Church today.

It is only common sense
That it's built on false pretense,
Lies abound within the church.
Oh, the peace that you will find
When the web of lies unwind,
And you leave the Mormon Church behind.

(CHORUS)

When you leave the Mormon Church,
They may turn their backs on you,
And say you don’t have a clue.
But the truth will set you free,
When you’re out, I know you will agree.

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When I first began writing LDS Hymn Parodies, I first began by posting them on my other blog (http://mormonismschism.blogspot.com/), and then decided it would be a good idea for them to have their own dedicated place (with special pages in alphabetical order and all), so this blog was created for that purpose.

Having been born and raised in the Mormon Church, I spent my entire life singing hymns, not only in church meetings but also in various Ward and Stake Choirs (and even in the Southern California Mormon Choir). Ward Choir Director was also my calling for awhile. Since I also play the piano (and learned from a Mormon piano teacher), I also learned to play the hymns, and was Pianist in Primary, Sunday School, and Relief Society. Naturally, playing the piano led to learning to play the organ, and then being Ward Organist for a long time.

So it's no wonder that I have so many LDS hymns stuck in my brain. It amazes me just how many hymns I can still sing from memory. Of course, since I've been out of Mormonism now for over 8 years, it irritates me that I know the words to so many Mormon-themed hymns. So one day, I started making up alternative words - and found it very amusing and extremely cathartic. The first hymn I parodied was "I Stand All Amazed," and since then I haven't been able to stop. So I'm gonna just keep going until I can't think of anymore. But since I apparently have the gift for blasphemy (as my daughter recently told me), that probably won't happen anytime soon.

I hope you enjoy my "spin" on some old familiar LDS Hymn favorites. But if you don't, you're probably a TBM and not an ExMormon like me. Oh, well...

MY EXIT FROM MORMONISM

As a preface to my thoughts about Mormonism (and my exit from my lifelong religion), I would like to share the following quote:

"Well, it's either true or false. If it's false, we're engaged in a great fraud. If it's true, it's the most important thing in the world. Now, that's the
whole picture. It is either right or wrong, true or false, fraudulent or true."

President Gordon B. Hinckley,
Interview, "The Mormons,"
PBS Documentary, April 2007

In essence, after researching the roots of Mormonism, which obviously form its foundation, as well as examining its doctrine in depth, I have concluded that it is a great fraud. Having been born and raised in the Mormon Church, and remaining LDS until my early 50's, facing that realization was very difficult and was not done lightly.

SOME BACKGROUND:
In the Summer of 2001, I went on a Mormon Church History Tour. Before going, I decided to do some research so I would know more about what occurred at the key places when we visited them. But that was the beginning of the end for me as I discovered more and more of the sordid history of the Mormon Church. Soon, I began to realize that Joseph Smith made the whole thing up and that the Mormon Church is built on an enormous stack of lies. Sadly, I also began to realize that I had allowed the Mormon Church to pull the wool over my eyes for a very long time. But even with that realization, it took me quite a while longer to finally break away because of how intricately my life was tied up in Mormonism and how long I had been blinded by the lies Mormonism perpetuates (which, of course, is what they are counting on).

But finally, I did break away - and I have now been Mormonism Free for over 8 years. What I have realized during the ensuing years is that my intellectual curiosity was squelched by Mormonism. Being told to "just believe" and "have faith" was very detrimental to my psyche, particularly since so much made little sense. Trying to rationalize through everything had a negative effect on me as well, making me very confused and uncomfortable. Since that time, I have discovered that these types of feelings are called "cognitive dissonance" (a feeling of discomfort when simultaneously holding two or more conflicting ideas, beliefs, values or emotional reactions). Cognitive dissonance is discussed in greater length in a book I have written, which is coming soon to Amazon.com and Kindle. Since leaving Mormonism behind, I have grown so much and have discovered who I really am - and that is a tremendous gift.

As noted above, a book I have written is coming soon to Amazon.com and Kindle. That book (entitled "Finding My Own Voice: The AHA!! Moments of a Former Mormon Woman") chronicles my very long journey through and away from Mormonism and discussed many of the issues that had plagued me for many years. Also, on my other blog - www.mormonismschism.blogspot.com - you will find some poems I have written about my views concerning various aspects of Mormonism as well as discussions relative to the issues that led to my decision to eventually disassociate myself from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

In sharing my opinions and the information I have uncovered, it is my hope that I can in some small way help others by offering some insights into issues that many Mormons undoubtedly face in determining whether or not their faith has been misplaced.

For those of you who are thinking, "Oh, those Ex-Mormons... they can leave the church but they can't leave it alone," I offer this quote:

"Some of you are probably thinking, "Why don't you just leave them (the Mormons) alone?" So I ask you, if you saw a thirsty man drinking water from a well you knew to be poisoned, would you let him continue to drink or would you guide him to a safe well? ~Christopher Miller

While I'm sure that active Mormons (TBMs) and the Mormon Church itself would be much happier if people who have left the church kept their opinions to themselves, I cannot do that. If I can help one person to see the lies that are laced throughout Mormonism, then I will feel that my efforts have not been in vain.